Boxes of tender mercies

Fun story this week about how awesome the Lord is and another about how important it is to be worthy as a missionary and a representative of the Lord.

Fun story first. So, we have had two box on the floor of our living room for, well, as long as I've been in this apartment and as long as Hermana Rubio has been in this apartment and therefore, at least 6 months and who knows how much longer. And these boxes has been chilling next to the broken fridge for all this time and we have never really paid much attention to them until last Saturday or Sunday. This is because we started doing our exercise in the living room because it has the most space, and we put our tiny portable DVD player on these boxes to see it better so we can watch our zumba/salsa/crazy cardio video. Well, we had never opened the boxes and we has already de-junked and organized the rest of the random things and boxes in our apartment, so Hermana Rubio decided to see what was in the box. It was a box full of copies of the Book of Mormon! Now, this was an answer to our prayers because the mission office had been closed that week and we had investigators who needed a Book of Mormon and we had just given our last one to an investigator the day before. And it was an entire box full! Then, afterwards, we went to the box next to it and found a box full of old teaching records from a few years ago! There were a lot of people who these Elders had taught who have a real desire to improve themselves and fill their lives with meaning, which is what, I've seen in the few months I've been here, makes someone ready to accept the challenges and commitments of the missionaries. The Lord really does work miracles even if they just seem to some like a box full of old papers!

But its also been really interesting this week to see how important it is to be worthy and be focused and consecrated as a missionary. When we aren't being exactly obedient, when we are following the mission rules but still have our minds or our thoughts dwelling on things of the world - a song that’s stuck in our head or conversations about things that don't pertain to the work and are distracting us from the spirit - we cannot fully call upon the power of the Holy Ghost to teach and succor the needs of the people. We cannot love them in the manner that we need to as representatives of Jesus Christ.

This week, we also contacted a woman who was really nice and very sweet and although the circumstances didn't allow for a prayer or much of a message to be shared, she told us that she felt something special about the truths we were testifying of and asked us to come with her to visit her brother as well. So, on Saturday, we went to Cocorit with her and thought, oh she probably just wants us to teach him how to pray or maybe even tell him how he needs to be closer to God (because both of these situations have already passed and let me tell you, the second one is a very awkward situation to be in) and we thought it would be more or less a normal lesson. It wasn't. We found a family full of faith and love for one another, but desperate because her brother is really sick and the doctors aren't sure what's happening. So, they asked us to say a prayer and they were telling this man that we were there to ask God to heal him and that we were sent from God and everyone was crying and they have so much faith and the room was filled with love for this brother and standing there, trying to find the words to comfort this family and trying to find the words that Heavenly Father wanted him to here, it was a little overwhelming to feel in this moment what the magnitude of our calling signified and required in this moment for this sweet family. I am incredibly grateful, that although I am not perfect, and I am not a perfect person, that I can repent and be worthy through the Atonement of Jesus Christ. I'm not a perfect missionary and I'm still learning who exactly the Lord wants me to be, and how exactly I can be consecrated in their work, but I am exceptionally glad that there is a manner that I can try to do this and the Lord will make up all the difference. And, really, it ended up being a really amazing, beautiful experience as we simply testified of how much love Heavenly father has for this man and for his family and how we can have hope through our trials.

I am so grateful to have a loving God who really does care about me and about every one of His children and that I really do know He loves me because I don’t know what I would do without this knowledge.

Con mi amor eterno,

Hna Rawlings